Next year there will be three Formula 1 races in America, but Austin will always have the title of US Grand Prix. Miami and Vegas aren’t real race tracks, they are events. Austin hosts a world class circuit that produces world class racing.
A Wander Down the Strip
We’d only parked Berta the day before and our flight wasn’t until the evening, so we had a gentle day at home. I did some thorough mountain bike maintenance, we went on a mission to find a portable fan for the camp (Dan had been scarred by last year’s swampiness) and didn’t quite get to unpacking the van properly. Around 1pm we dropped off Cleo to her new sitter. A very cheap option, Carlos welcomed Cleo into his small apartment in Foster City and she seemed right at home. We got Dan a new pair of Tevas on the way home and they would be his only shoes for the entire weekend. The portable fan mission was exactly that, requiring visits to multiple shops but we didn’t mind, we were buzzing around in our SVT. We knew it would be a good weekend when a piece of luck meant that Dan found the Starship IPA, a limited edition beer by Voodoo Ranger that he’d long since given up on finding. He’d finished the first one by the time we got home.
We actually started packing late in the afternoon, a simple affair of gathering our camping gear and whatever F1 swag we had. Our mate Kyle picked us up after he got off work and we joined the traffic, chatting non-stop. Heading north on the 101, we’d passed the bridge to take us across the Bay and then were close to SFO when I realized we were going to the wrong airport. The whole reason we’d asked Kyle to give us a lift was that they lived next to Oakland airport, where we were flying out of. Everyone in the car had spaced and Kyle was on autopilot following Google maps to SFO. Whoops. That added 45 minutes to our drive time and I was grateful that I’d allowed so much time to get us to the airport. We’d have missed our flight otherwise. Kyle was full of sorry’s, but we all agreed that any one of us could have caught it and this is why you allow yourself extra time!
At the correct airport, we we had just enough time for a quick bite and a beer before boarding. It was barely an hour to Las Vegas. Although Austin isn’t far from San Francisco, flying cheap meant an indirect flight. Flying super cheap also meant a flight cancellation that meant we’d be staying the night. Having booked the flights with points, I wasn’t too upset to book us in at the Oyo Hotel and Casino for $50. Arriving at 10pm and leaving the next morning at 6am, we planned to make the most of our night on the strip.
A quick Uber ride saw us to our hotel and after waiting way too long to check-in, we soon had drinks in hand (buy one, get one) and headed up to our rooms. We were thrilled and stunned to find we had a little smoker’s balcony at the end of our huge room complete with a door that opened to the night air! No strip view, but the fresh air was welcome. I sipped on my cocktail looking down into the carpark while Dan did a costume change, then we were on the strip.
It was past 10pm on a weeknight when we hit the concrete and we weren’t the least bit tired. Without plans, much like the last time we were here (Ramsie’s busted transmission), we got ourselves a couple of drinks at the friendly ABC store and walked north along the strip. We stopped at a Ponda Express for a late dinner, but otherwise just wandered. We caught the end of a show at the Bellagio fountain and tried to discover new paths walking through the indoor pieces of the strip.
Heading south back to our rooms, we got ourselves a night cap at a CVS pharmacy, shocked to see security kick someone out as he attempted to shop lift, then watch that same person successfully lift a cold beer a few minutes later. We saw him sitting comfortably on a bench a few hundred meters away on our walk home, enjoying his cold beverage.
It was around 2am when we returned to our rooms and I felt like I had some night shift immunity, not feeling overwhelmed with tiredness. I remember turning on the TV and falling asleep to a nature documentary about wildebeest.
We only got a few hours sleep before waking, having a quick shower and Ubering five minutes to the airport. With no food available in the airport at the early hour, I was happy that I’d grabbed a to-go sandwich at the CVS last night, though it didn’t really taste like anything.
To my great surprise, after the plane had boarded, there was an empty seat next to me! We were sitting apart (flying cheap) and so it was nice when the other guy in my row agreed to let Dan sit by me. We could use each other’s shoulders for sleep at least. Also surprising was the lack of F1 swag. We were flying to Austin on the Thursday before the race and not one Mercedes or Red Bull hat? People obviously hadn’t got the memo. The 2.5 hour flight went slowly for me despite intermittent naps and upon landing, I soon discovered that Dan hadn’t enjoyed himself in the slightest, unable to get a wink of sleep in thanks to his discomfort in the minimalist seats.
In the time between landing and de-planing, I’d bought us a pair of bus tickets that would get us around Austin for the day and booked a spot for our hiking pack to be held while we toured the city – at a barber shop of all places! A new discovery, the app called Bounce was used to give people options for luggage storage and it only cost us $7 for the day!
After collecting our bag, Austin was starting to feel more like it was hosting a race with the Red Bull car from last year parked up in the foyer and Land Norris’ face adorning advertisements for high-end luggage. Dan was fast turning into a zombie so I lead the way to the bus where we boarded and unfortunately saw two people left behind because they hadn’t pre-purchased their tickets online and didn’t have any cash. Why there aren’t simple tap/swipe credit card machines on public transport, I will never understand.
The bus slowly filled as we approached the city and we were met with a lovely breeze as we were dropped in the heart of downtown. Our barber shop was only a few blocks away and I had an interesting chat with the owners, learning about this Bounce app and how busy it kept them. Little extra money for them, supreme convenience for us, they were lovely. With the weight literally taken off our shoulders, we were free to roam. It was barely 11am and we didn’t have anywhere to be but River Forest Haven by nightfall.
We wandered the streets, finding a Williams Racing event where we took polaroid photos next to their display car and balked at the merchandise prices and line to drive the simulator. Further up the road we found ourselves a shaded spot at some outdoor seating at Out of Nowhere with a food truck out the back. With burgers on the way but no fries left, I completed the meal with spiced fries from a nearby Turkish food truck.
Dan was still in dire need of a nap after food so we wandered north to the State Capitol where rolling grass hills awaited. He set himself down under a shaded tree while I wanderd into the visitor’s center and found out about the next running free tour and perused the artwork and exhibits. Texans love their 5-pointed star!
I showed up in the foyer of the main building for the 3pm tour and was joined by a group of nearly 30. Our tour guide, Richard, was brilliant. A stooping older man with a bit of a hunch back, he shared some great history with enough jokes to keep everyone chuckling for most of the tour. We visited the senate and the house, saw chandeliers with multiple 5-pointed stars and “TEXAS” written everywhere it would fit into the furniture. I’ve already forgotten all of the history I’ve learnt, but it was interesting at the time!
After wandering through the basement levels, I made my way outside to find my husband laying just where I’d left him. He’d managed to get a good hour of sleep in and was much better for it. We perused the tourist magazines I’d picked up, contemplating our next move.
We got onto a bus that took us to the south side of the city aiming for the Bartan pools, but we never made it there, instead stopping at a food truck area for an early dinner. As I sat waiting for a pizza, Dan had a very long chat with a cannabis vendor while I watched a group of people from the company Stripe prepare for some event. They looked out of place because the crowd that they were obviously there to target hadn’t shown up yet.
With the sun going down, we decided a walk along the river back into the city center was on the cards. We enjoyed a gentle stroll amongst hundreds of runners getting their after-work jog in. It was a zoo, but the gravel path is wide and perfectly shaded. From here, it seems that Austin is a city of outdoorsy people.
Back at the barber shop, I reluctantly shlepped the hiking pack onto my back and we caught another bus towards River Forest Haven. We stopped at our usual supermarket at a major intersection and stocked up for the race weekend. From there, we Uber’d to our rooms and were stoked to find that while the drive out to camp was unchanged, the campground was much improved.
As a start, it obviously hadn’t been deccimated by rain as it had been last year, there were two showers now, complete with a staging deck and the common area which had been a bare field was now nicely lit up with picnic tables.
Our campsite (#1) was away from it all, nowhere near the river and out of sight of everbody. The picnic table was a nice addition and we weren’t sweating through our shirts! The breeze we’d enjoyed in the city carried into the haven and we enjoyed setting up camp. We strung up our headlamps using a rope over the table and left the fly off the tent.
I Wanna Rock N Roll All Night
Matching Lotus Kimi Raikkonen shirts were our choice of garb for the day. After enjoying a beautiful hot shower, we packed our bag and set out along Man O War drive to meet our Uber. Munching on an apple, strolling through the quiet countryside, we felt as if we’d come home. Our Uber ride showed up and he had to avoid a few dogs as we drove out towards the track. The drive was familiar and despite the mid-morning start, traffic hadn’t formed yet.
We got a really surprise when our driver dropped us off at a high school nowhere near the circuit. He said some broken English that didn’t mean much, but this was obviously the new ride share system COTA had implemented. Buses awaited to take us to the circuit and we immediately knew that this would not do. I was already thinking of Sunday and this wouldn’t get us to the gates in time for prime Turn 1 seating. Today though, there was no pressure, so we followed the signs and got on a bus that plodded along back country roads to the track.
After the bus ride, we still had to do the mile-long walk from the old Uber drop-off point and we knew for sure that this would not do! At the gates, we showed our wristbands and easily snuck in our contraband snacks. We were at COTA! We made a beeline for the F1 outlet and at first I was disappointed because it seemed as though it wasn’t around this year, but it had just moved. We were in and I left with a handful of classic shirts, both for me and friends. It is crucial to get in early because by the end of the weekend, all they had left were Lance Stroll gear.
I was on cloud nine then and didn’t care where the rest of the day took us, but our first track view was at the back end of the track. Turn 19, a square-shaped hairpin at the pit exit, was a great place to really hear the cars under power as they drive away from you. There was a classic F1 session going on so we watched a few cars barrel past then figured we needed some lunch and beers.
We exited the circuit at the gate by the main straight and walked over to the gas station where our Texas BBQ friends from last year were doing some fine business. They remembered us and we were impressed that they were wearing F1 gear. They were fully getting into the spirit. I can’t emphasize just how friendly these guys are. A family-run business, they’re always smiling and laughing and damn they serve some great food. We ordered a couple of plates and Dan went inside to stock up on beer. He’d bought an IPA at the track on the way to Turn 19 and that was the last $15 we’d spend on food or drink inside the circuit. He got six tall boys for that at the gas station.
Fueled up and with a practice session coming up, we re-entered the track, walking through a wide open and un-manned gap in the fence since it wasn’t worth going through bag check. They really don’t try too hard on the Friday. We snuck into the main grandstand and to say that we “snuck” is a stretch. There was so many people moving about that the teenagers working the tape had lost interest in checking people.
We sat ourselves in front of the Red Bull garage (obviously) and got properly excited for the weekend of racing ahead. The main grandstand is a great place to watch practice from because you can see the team’s in action, and celebrity spot. I started my hooting and hollering when I saw DC, then Ted Kravitz wandering down the pit lane in his trademark shorts and headphones.
My excitement was at such a level that it caused the guy sitting behind us to ask what I was going on about. He was a lovely Dutch guy who we quickly made friends with and I explained that it was a Sky presenter that had me all hot and bothered. Dan offered him a beer and we were soon drinking together.
Dan was on point, spotting the newly crowned champion first, noticing his white and gold racing boots visible at the back of the garage. His car was soon out on the track with the others in the field and with the start of the practice session, the excitement level of others in the small crowd crept up to my level.
The session went quickly and we were thrilled to see so much action right in front of us. The flag at the top of the hill flew brilliantly as we got our first taste of the 2022 cars. We said goodbye to our mate and started mingling around the circuit. We climbed the hill to our tenderly loved Turn 1 and scoped our spot for Sunday. Yes, it would be exactly the same as last year.
By the Turn 4 esses, I was stoked to find yet another F1 Outlet and so more shopping was done. Out of beer, we dipped out to the gas station again for supplies, then back in to take our positions for the afternoon practice session. We swung by the Mexican Fiesta tent on the way, it had obviously been put there to entertain the many Checo fans.
In the Turn 10 grandstand now, it was nice that they had the session so late in the day because the late sun made the cars shine.
We took a couple of seats at the top of the stand and marveled at the amount of people here on a Friday. We had a great vantage point, watching the cars speed through the esses and then go flat out towards the back hairpin.
Once the session was over, we only had time to kill before the night’s concert got going. We watched the sunset, Dan nearly had a nap leaning against the back of the grandstand, in a bit of a beer coma. Just like last year, we watched as crowds gathered at the entrance points to the inside of the hairpin, the general admission area to the concert.
Just after sun-down, the gates were opened and the masses let loose. It was incredible to watch these die hard fans race across the grass to get a good view of their favorite band. It was sad when an hour later, people who’d paid for the upgrade sauntered in right in front of them to stand on the track right under the stage.
Once it was properly dark, we joined the masses, not wanting to miss a minute of the show. At around 8pm, the stage lights came up and “Blitzkrieg Bop” raged from the speakers. Shortly after, a man (or woman) dressed in a bunny suit came out on stage and got the crowd properly riled up. People were singing the lyrics at the top of their lungs and we were doing the same. I felt for the people who’d queued and run to their positions because we were only a few rows back from the front of the general area. The view was great.
When the bunny was dragged away, we roared with the rest of the crowd when Green Day came out. Wow. We hadn’t even paid extra for this! They blasted right into American Idiot and I started jumping around and singing. We were seeing and hearing Green Day! The energy was massive.
They played more than I expected from their newer albums, but the crowd really got going with songs like “Hitchin’ a Ride” and “Welcome to Paradise”. At one point he welcomed a fan up on stage and the poor girl could hardly function after Billy hugged her. He tried to get her to sing along with him. Obviously something he’s well versed at, he simply instructed her to stage dive into the crowd. Good on her, she nailed it.
“Boulevard of Broken Dreams”, “St Jimmy”, “Bohemian Rhapsody”, “I Wanna Rock N Roll All Night”, we rocked along to it all. The highlight was when Billy asked if anyone in the crowd could play guitar. A long haired guy got the gig and he was soon handed a white guitar by Billy and they started jamming. A couple chords here and there, then Billy gently pushed him to the front of the stage and he played the whole song and nailed it. What an incredible chance, I was so stoked to see it. Dan couldn’t have timed it worse, he’d just gone to the bathroom so I had to describe it to him when he got back. Mauricio from Costa Rica had just rocked out in front of 80,000 people with one of the biggest bands in America. He got to keep the guitar.
After the drummer Tre destroyed his drum set and Mike the basist left the stage, Billy serenaded the crowd with “Time of Your Life”, a song I never thought I’d see fireworks set off too. What a band, what a show, we’d just seen Green Day. We meandered around with the rest of the crowd on a high. We didn’t have anywhere to be in a hurry so we slowly made our way to the Uber bus station.
To our surprise, there wasn’t much of a line and we were soon on our way to the random high school. Dan was still in a beer coma so I took charge once we got off the bus. There were Uber personnel around directing human traffic but it seemed like chaos dressed up as order. The Uber and Lyft prices were near $100 so we opted to have some dinner at the Sonic drive through across the road. It was a set-up I was completely unfamiliar with. When I tried to go through the front door, I was directed to move away. The establishment was not for customers. You either had to order from the drive-in station or this screen with a button on it next to some picnic tables. Dan was in no state to help me navigate this American set-up and he was getting into a tired, hungry mood so I made an executive decision to get what we needed. I approached one of the many men lingering around offering rides for cash. We didn’t have any cash, but I negotiated a $60 ride to be paid with Venmo on the condition that he drove us first to one of the drive-in slots at the Sonic so we could get ourselves fed. That worked a treat.
At the campsite, there wasn’t enough cell service to pay him and he was kind enough to trust us to take his information and pay him when we could. That ended up being a whole ordeal – we wouldn’t get enough service to pay him until Sunday, but we got there eventually! We ate our warm burgers and chips at camp and were quickly in bed.
Helpful Aussie
Another late-ish start today since the F1 action wouldn’t be starting until 1pm. I was stoked to be, for the first time ever, wearing a Daniel Ricciardo shirt. Dan also looked dapper in his brand new Haas garb. I’d really bought the shop yesterday and now I was stoked to show it off.
We grabbed our apples, ordered an Uber and started our walk down Man O War drive. One of our doggy friends joined us this time, a super friendly boy with a thick black coat, he followed whoever had the most apple left. When our food was gone, he quickly skipped back to his yard.
We would not be going to the high school today and catching buses like commoners. A Spanish lady picked us up and once we got going, I asked if she would mind dropping us off to our BBQ gas station. No problem at all! She didn’t want to go to the high school either. It’s a shit show for patrons and drivers because of the crowds it generates. We directed her past COTA to our spot and I changed the drop-off location in the Uber app so that she was paid for the extra miles. That was easy enough! We thanked (and tipped) her profusely, bought a few supplies at the gas station and said hello to our BBQ mates. We were impressed to see them wearing new hats celebrating Max’s championship and promised we’d be back for lunch.
We picked up a golf cart heading across the carpark to the entrance and it was nice to see security at the gate attempting to do bag checks. Still no problem sneaking in our snacks and beer.
We snuck into the main grandstand for a quick peak at the morning’s activities and caught the start of an endurance car race, a good place to watch over twenty cars at full tilt off the line!
It was mid-morning so we had plenty of time to wander around and that we did. Passing another F1 Outlet, I couldn’t resist going in to see their new stock and got me a bright orange Netherlands GP shirt, just in case I ever find myself near an orange army. To my delight, when I peered into the bag after leaving, I found a white McLaren Renault polo shirt from an era gone by. I hadn’t bought it, but it must have been in the bag they put it in and it was my bloody size! Winning!
We took a tour down driver’s lane and I got a picture with my man, which may be the last chance I get since he won’t be on the grid next year.
We perused the real merchandise stands and balked at the outrageous prices. You couldn’t get a Max Verstappen hat for less than $100 and the special edition NFL style shirts were $240! They are just shirts!
When noon came around, it was about time we took up our seats for Practice 3. We wanted to be on the opposite side of the circuit so Dan suggested a trolley ride. Yes that would do! We exited out the main gate and found ourselves on a trolley being towed by a truck in no time. The weather was beautiful, another sunny day and not too humid, we let the wind whip at our hair as we toured the circuit backwards. We got off at the gate by the Turn 4 esses and crossed into the middle of the track for the first time.
Crowds were already gathering on every piece of grass and vantage point around the track in anticipation of the upcoming session. We didn’t really have a plan but were on the lookout for a vulnerable grandstand entrance. We crossed another bridge near the COTA tower to be on the outside of the circuit again and when we exited through the mass of people crowding the bridge for a good look at the circuit, I felt a tug on my shorts. Dan had tugged me firmly twice, then walked off through the crowd. I didn’t have a chance to ask anything so I just followed. When I saw him casually dip into an un-manned entrance to the Turn 15 grandstand, I quickened my pace and got on his heels. Under the structure, we turned right, sneaking past security stationed at a different entrance, but he was looking the other way so we easily made it up the stairs without issue.
The stand was half full. Looking back down at where we’d come from, we must have walked past 500 hundred people crammed onto a patch of grass on their chairs and blankets right next to the grandstand. If only they knew… I looked at Dan with such pride. He’d seen a golden opportunity and taken it with both hands, knowing I’d trust him completely. I’m glad he’s on my team.
We parked up at the very top of the grandstand where we had a great view of the crowds moving behind and below us and a stunning view of the circuit. Within five minutes of us being there, cars came out on circuit. We could see them exiting the esses and making their way through the back hairpin but the highlight was seeing them under braking at the end of the back straight. They were at their top speed and it was astounding to see how late they’d brake into Turn 12. We saw multiple lock-ups as they made their way through the sequence of corners leading up to Turn 15 (right in front of us) where they’d get on the power and drive away through a long right-hander. We had a TV right in front, this was perfect.
Needless to say, we spent the whole session there and only had to move partway through the session when security decided they’d crack down on all of us sitting up top because it was an ADA area. No matter, we chose some free seats a few rows down and carried on our watching.
This was a great spot to really see the cars in action and understand their different characteristics. We were constantly pointing different things out to each other that we noticed. We couldn’t really focus much on the times because the TV was just a little too far away for us to read the numbers.
With that session over, we lingered in the stands awhile, switching our interest to people watching. This was our third time together at COTA and we’d always wanted to go up the tower for a view. It was only $30 for the privilege but looking down at the crowd, we were reminded why we’ll never bother. The line to get up the tower snaked through the paddock and we’d picked out someone wearing a cowboy hat before the practice session had started to see how far he’d get. Well, he’d spent the whole F1 session with no TV to look at, no commentary to hear, just waiting in line. He’d made it about 50 meters.
We had a few hours to kill before the Saturday’s highlight of qualifying so we dipped out of the circuit for lunch. Back to the BBQ guys, they were happy to see us as always. As we were waiting for our order, just lingering outside, Dan saw a wristband on the ground and promptly picked it up. It was just like ours. Throughout the whole weekend, there’d been half a dozen guys hustling tickets, offering to buy and sell them. This wristband had obviously been dropped by one of them. Dan was subtle and slipped it straight into his pocket and neither of us spoke of it.
When lunch came, we sat ourselves down at the lone picnic table and were joined by a pair of sisters who lived in the area and came out here just to see the action outside the track. They were lovely. They told us how they’d moved out of California, came out here, bought some land and started a business. They seemed very happy and we told them that next year they should offer their land for camping during the event. She took our advice and promised to do so next year and even offered us a discounted rate!
During lunch, Dan had noticed one of the ticket hustlers come back to the picnic table area, scanning the floor for the wristband he’d obviously lost but had given up before long. On our way back into the track, I egged Dan on to sell the wristband to these guys. As soon as he approached someone, he was engulfed – the whole team wanted a piece of his action. I waited over by the fence, anxious to see what kind of money we were going to walk away with.
When he walked over to me with a smile, he said he’d gotten a measly $60. Wow. These tickets were worth $350! But hey, we were ripping them off – it would pay for our Uber ride home.
Back into the circuit and this was the final sneak-in challenge for the weekend. It had to be the main grandstand. There were no gaps to walk through now, but still the entrances were manned by teenagers so I liked our chances. With Dan right behind me, we picked our time when both teenagers were occupied with people asking questions or getting tickets checked. When a girl stopped me as I tried to walk through, I said, “I’m just going to use the bathroom” and so she let me through. She obviously thought that good enough for my husband too because he was right behind me. Neither of us looked back and we didn’t dare smile at each other until we were in a pair of seats.
Perfect. We could even choose our pit garage and of course that meant Red Bull. We moved seats a few times after the session started, then ditched them completely and stood behind the back row with a huge amount of people. The crowd cheered as theyr favorites crossed the line, everyone happy to be seeing these cars going full tilt for the first time.
The view from the stands is epic as they fly past you at 300+ kph and climb up the hill to Turn 1. The huge American flag they’d erected at the peak of Turn 1 was effective, really completing the picture as they rounded the steep corner.
As Q3 got underway, a security lady kept walking up and down the back row instructing us to take our seats. Of course everyone just moved along and went and stood somewhere else but she was determined! We eventually spotted a couple of spare seats and took them, enjoying the rest of the session in peace and uproar as the session came to a close. We were stoked for Ferrari and especially for Carlos Sainz to pip Charles Leclerc to pole. Max was right on their tails and we anticipated a Ferrari fuck up the next day that would hand Max the win.
As the grandstand cleared out, we didn’t really go anywhere. We stayed to watch the podium interviews, then started meandering out towards the BBQ joint.
More BBQ for dinner (we still weren’t sick of it), we parked up our chairs up high in the carpark to watch the sunset and the traffic chaos. It was a good show this year, complete with a burst water pipe that was making a complete mess of things, VIPs in fancy black SUVs trying to make their way through the shuffle and thousands of people on foot trying to find their way out.
It was a gorgeous sunset and we just couldn’t help smiling at each other, liking our way of doing things.
Ed Sheeran was the headliner for that night but we were more interested in getting to bed early than seeing him. After dinner, the crowd still seemed too big to attempt at getting on the Uber buses, so we wandered back into the circuit. Absolutely no security now. If you were really determined, I’m sure you could just waltz in, spend the night in a sleeping bag underneath the Turn 1 grandstand and have your spot nailed for the morning.
We walked into the main grandstand where we’d spent qualifying and enjoyed watching the F1 teams go about their late night business, some working on body work, engines, etc. while other cars were neatly tucked under covers in their garage, the teams out to dinner. It’s such a nice time to be on circuit. There was a fair amount of people milling about and some got cocky, dipping underneath the catch fencing and getting onto the track and then some of them, over the other side and into the pitlane. We saw people clambering all over the Red Bull pit wall, where the team bosses and strategists sit throughout sessions. Calmly, a pair of Red Bull mechanics came out and covered it with a tarp to discourage the Instagram photo hunters.
We heard a practice run of the National Anthem come through the speakers and watched the big screen as team personnel got their chance to shine as cameras caught them running the track.
At around 7:30pm, we figured the crowds would have died down enough so we made our way out of the circuit and towards the Uber bus station. We attempted to flag down any golf cart we could and when we’d given up, a lady driving one flagged us down in near the main entrance. She asked where we were going and we said that just up the hill would be fine. She already had a passenger and when we discovered that he was going to the Uber bus station, we figured we’d stick around for the ride. Our buddy was an Aussie bloke, probably in his 70s and holding a cane, hence the golf cart ride. He was from Perth and was here with one of his sons and his mates, but they’d gone off to the concert and so he was on his own to get back. He told us all about the challenges of his day, and how he’d spent the last two hours just trying to find his way to the Uber bus station, having been told the wrong thing multiple times. Despite that, he was in good spirits.
When we neared the Uber bus station, our mouths opened in shock. There was a line about 500 meters long. When our driver offered to drop us off at the end of the line, our mate said “No way! I’ve got a cane, I won’t be standing in that line!” When we made to get off, he said not to. “Don’t worry about that kids, you’re with me!” We looked at each other, wondering how we felt about taking advantage of a disabled man, but the driver was already off so we stayed on with him. She dropped us at the front of the line, right by an empty bus and I looked at the ground and our new Uncle took charge and walked towards the empty bus. One of the volunteers wearing a vest saw his cane and said to get him on a bus immediately. We sheepishly followed, him always saying, “Come along then kids” in his classic Aussie accent.
We didn’t make eye contact with anyone who got on the bus after us and continued chatting with our new friend all the way to the high school. He was starving so we produced a Clif bar for him. The least we could do for the hours he’d saved us.
At the high school, we asked if we could help him in any way to get his Uber, but he was self sufficient and wished us well. Thanks mate!
I checked Uber and Lyft prices and they weren’t bad at $45 but after half an hour, our ride hadn’t shown up so we gave up and went old school. Armed with our $60 cash from Dan’s earlier scam, we started asking around. Most people balked at the $60 offer but we eventually got a bite. A lovely guy with a nice SUV, he told us about the measly pay Uber drivers get and so this was their best way to make money. We were back at River Forest Haven within 15 minutes. We’d had a wonderful day of racing.
Turn 1
Today was the day that mattered. We rose at 5am, enjoyed a hot shower and ordered an Uber from camp before starting down our familiar drive. It was dark but not too cold, still easily shorts weather. We were dressed in our best. Dan in his Red Bull party shirt, me in my birthday Number 33. We had to wave vigorously at our driver to stop him but we were soon on our way. I got right into pleading our case to be dropped off at the gas station and he had no problem with it. When I tried to change the drop-off location as I’d done yesterday, he was going to get less money, so I left it as is. He was so curious about our timing, wondering what the hell we were going to do before gates opened. I explained that this was our jam and it was necessary to get a decent spot on the Turn 1 hill.
As soon as he pulled up, we gave him our profuse thanks, then shut the doors and sprinted away. Dan had the bag so I was ahead and I was careful to avoid the holes in the grass between the gas station and the carpark. At the gate, I felt a bit of deja vu, it looked just as it had last year. There were about twenty people there, gathered in groups sitting in camping chairs. We took up our spot next to a small group sitting on the left side of the gates.
We got to know our new line mates, I spoke to a guy about my age who soon learnt I was Aussie and told me all about his friend who lived in Airlie (Arr-lee) beach that he wanted to visit. Gates were due to open at 8am and so we made ourselves comfortable for the next couple of hours. At around 6:30am, Dan went over to our BBQ mates to pick up some breakfast and I called Dad for an update, just as I’d done last year. I described the scene around me and he was proud that we’d done it, yet again. When a hot burrito was put in front of me, I hung up and fueled up.
Around 7am, security personnel started showing up and they seemed much more organized than last year. There were more people in gray shirts signifying more management. By that time, there was a proper line forming that curved away from us towards the road and people still sat in their chairs, relaxing. At around 7:15am, there was a huge stir when the security team started shouting something about wristbands being in the rightmost lane. There was a panic. Our friends, being wristband holders, quickly packed up their gear and joined the line on the right, putting them at least one hundred people back. I pleaded with them not to, that we’d be able to get through in our lane, but they followed the crowd. I remember looking my new mate in the eye and just saying, “No!” But off he went. We held firm where we were and distinct lines started forming for each lane. Now we were on pole. I had no doubt we’d be let through at the same time as everyone that had just moved to the right lane.
That was the end of the sitting, everyone was too amped now to rest in their chairs. There was a short argument behind us when a guy came up just behind us to join his mate who’d been waiting in line and the guy behind him wasn’t having it. An older guy in a Ferrari shirt defused the situation by inviting the guy from behind to come and be in front of him. Surprisingly, we made friends with Andy, the guy who’d complained. He was a first timer to the gate run and he was suitably intimidated by my legs and running shoes. He was regretting wearing his skate shoes. When he asked the best route to the hill, I explained it to him, telling him to turn right at the road which is total bullshit, you need to turn left. I was in competitive mode!
The security personnel spread out across the six or so lanes and I was quick to make friends with the lady in front of me. She was a lovely lady, a veteran of COTA, volunteering at all sorts of events in her spare time. I packed my jumper away at 7:30am and pulled our ground sheet out of our bag in preparation for our run. I was glad that I did because only fifteen minutes later, we were let in. They moved the gates aside, instructing everybody to stay where they were, which we all did, but then someone on the team shouted, “gates are open!” and we started moving forward. I held my wristband hand up high and started to jog but my security lady instructed me to walk and so I did. I was first through the gates and then I let my legs fly free. I sprinted my heart out.
I turned around only once when Andy shouted out and I slowed thinking that maybe the gates had been shut behind us since it was too early but that was not the case, the mov was running behind me so I sprinted off. I turned left, crossed the bridge and started the trudge up the hill. I was competing with people flowing in from the Turn 1 gate now but I had plenty of time. I pegged our spot and put the sheet down. Andy was right behind me and wanted to remain friends so he plopped his blanket down.
We then made our hill family. The guy to my left was on his own with only a towel and when I found out he was camping for eight, we spread my sheet right out to save enough room for him. Dan was only minutes behind Andy and he carried a collection of rocks in his hands. Smart! I’d forgotten about our troubles from last year with the front of chairs tilting down too much because of the hill. By the time we got our chairs set up and leveled with our rocks, there was room enough for singles or couples only and by about 8am, there was no more grass to be seen.
The sun rose above the hill and we were elated. When Andy’s camp showed up, we were excited to meet his wife Sarah and their neighbors from New Mexico who they warned us could be a little boisterous. It didn’t take us long to find out that Andy and Sarah were future vanners so we had heaps in common. They told us all about their plight to purchase a Ford Transit van to kit out and receiving a damaged one, then having their ordered van get lost, then not being able to buy one at all because demand is so high.
We enjoyed the on-track action from our perch, seeing Formula Ford and some exhibitions of older McLaren F1 cars which Dan especially appreciated because he’d never heard a non V6-hybrid F1 engine.
A couple of hours before race time, when both the hill and the grandstand were full, we turned our heads to hear what everyone was cheering about. It was Will Buxton at the front of the grandstand! He’s a presenter for F1TV who we’ve gotten to know since we watch their coverage and we went ballistic with everyone else. Since F1’s Netflix series aired, he’s become a full-on celebrity and after doing his filming bit, he could barely get away from the people asking for autographs and selfies.
The anticipation built and we were happy to have a good team around us. We all helped each other on advising which was the better exit path to go to the bathroom or get a drink and we soon discovered that climbing through the structure of the grandstand was the best way. For the ladies, we climbed all the way through to use the facilities, but the men just pissed under the structure. That was soon shut down and a sheriff was onsite to enforce the new law.
We learnt just how boisterous Andy and Sarah’s neighbors were when the Paddock Club ticket goers came by on their truck. Rich plebs who don’t give a hoot about F1 getting a tour of the track when us real fans are sat on our hill. The whole hill gave them the thumbs down and loud boos and we joined in the fun. The neighbors though, kept shouting, “Show me your butthole!” Boisterous!
We were stoked to see the drivers come by in pairs, either standing in the tray of a classic American truck, or sitting on the back of a convertible. Our boy Daniel got some big cheers but the biggest were for Sebastian Vettel. It would be his last race here and it doesn’t matter who you root for, everyone’s got respect for Seb.
When the cars come out for their recede laps, we got excited. I’d already gone for my last wee, but Dan went for another one and came back in time to watch the last few cars come by and watch the line-up on the grid. The anthem sounded just like it had during the practice run last night (not that good) and we were surprised that no jets or helicopters flew overhead. We later found out that it had been cancelled due to environmentalist protestors. The fireworks made up for it.
Before we knew it, the team personnel were walking off the grids and the lights went green. We made sure to get a photo of the two of us before the big event and wished everyone a good race. Nowhere else we’d rather be.
Lights out! They raced up the hill before us and hands flew up with shouting when Carlos Saint got turned around right in front of us. Good on you Russel, he only ended up with a five second penalty for his over-ambitious plunge down the inside. Turn 1 is where it’s at!
The race was absolutely brilliant, though hard to follow at times since we couldn’t head the commentary through the speakers. At one point during the rounds of pitstops, Sebastian Vettel rounded the last corner and blasted down the main straight, all by himself, in the LEAD of the Grand Prix! I shouted at Dan, “Is that Sebastian Vettel leading a Grand Prix?!” Yes it bloody was! The cheers he got and we were right in amongst it.
Latifi spun himself around in the first dozen of laps and so he was consistently half a lap behind the pack and for every single lap our crowd at Turn 1 gave him encouraging, if maybe a little sarcastic, cheers. Good on you Nic, thanks for showing up. When Alonso flew into the air on the other side of the track thanks to the other dickhead in the field, Lance Stroll, all hands went up to mouths. From where we stood, we couldn’t really see what had happened but knew it was carnage. Amazingly, Alonso carried on but it was a horrific crash. The safety car was welcome, bunching up the pack nicely.
There was some strategy in play by the remaining Ferrari and Lewis Hamilton, a bit of a repeat of last year’s race, but this time there was little doubt Max was going to win. Win he did and as the fireworks lit up the main straight as Max crossed the checkered flag, Dan had his shirt off and swung it over his head as the champion drove past us waving. We’d done it again, another brilliant race at COTA.
Many of the Turn 1ers had already abandoned their positions and were posted at the marked entrances to the track for the post-race invasion, but we weren’t bothered. We always liked watching the chaos unfold from the hill. We said goodbye to Andy and Sarah as they made their way to the track and just sat back and enjoyed the show. People were on the track well before all cars were into the pitlane, having broken a barrier or snuck through somewhere, then all hell broke loose. Fences were climbed over then broken down and there was destruction everywhere. We were very happy not to be a part of it.
I took advantage of one downed fence, stepping over it to get to a Marshall post porta-potty for a much needed wee. Dan did the same then we started meandering onto the track. Last year we’d headed towards the esses, but this time we walked down the main straight, not feeling the need to walk half the circuit as we’d done last year. We made our way into the main grandstand again to watch the packing up and fans lingering on the track and when we made to leave, Dan found an iPhone sitting under the seats we’d been occupying. We didn’t see anyone nearby so took the phone with us as we exited the circuit and wandered around aimlessly. I tried my usual tricks of using Siri to “Call Mum” or “Call Dad” but neither of those calls went through. I then flicked up to see recent messages and called Natalie. She answered and was relieved to know her friend’s phone had been found. She said she was in a red dress and we arranged a meeting point by the main entrance. As we walked there, we were on the outside of the perimeter fence and I saw a woman in a red dress walking quickly on the inside of the perimeter. I yelled out “Natalie!” and sure enough, it was her. Her friend, the owner of the phone, was with her and they were profusely grateful that we’d delivered his phone back to him. They offered us a reward, but we waved that away, wishing them a happy afternoon.
With the sun going down, we did our obligatory ride around the circuit on any trolley that would take us, soaking up the post-race atmosphere. We were let off at the top of Turn 1 where Dan found a lucky $2 bill floating around the dirt and we took a stroll down the hill to the gas station for surprise, surprise, a BBQ dinner. We told the boys who’d won and they were happy it had been their man. We took up our posting from the night before, watching opportunist selling ice cold drinks to the masses out of eskies for $5 a pop when they’d bought them cold just inside the gas station for 50c. Good business. Also good business was a group of women who drove past us in a golf cart recently loaded up with a few cases of cold beer from the gas station. When we appealed for a can, they obliged! They stopped the cart and threw us a pair of Dos Equis, instructing us in drunken stupor to tell everyone we met that we had a great time in fucking Texas.
After the sun had gone down, we figured we’d go play the Uber game so made our way over to that part of the circuit. At the main entrance, we saw a guy packing loads and loads of water bottle packs into his car. They were obviously left there as excess since the event was over. He saw us looking and said, “Come get what you need, take as many as you like!” We took a few and downed them then he asked if we needed a ride. Why, yes, we did! He had the Uber sign in his windscreen and explained that he’d been doing rides all weekend but was looking for a ride to take him out of there. He was done. Thanks very much! We offered him the usual $60 and he was happy with that. He fit a few more packs of water in his passenger seat and he held onto them to prevent them falling over as we drove away.
He’d had a good weekend making money and told us that Austin City Limits was next up in a few weeks to make him some decent cash.
Back at camp, we reflected on a weekend well done and didn’t mind the breeze that picked up into some serious wind overnight, we still had the fly off.
A Weekend Well Done
We woke late, decamped slowly, took a very long hot shower and kept our umbrellas handy for the rain that was forecast. One last Uber ride took us to the airport, way too early for our flight but we were armed with United lounge tickets so it didn’t matter to us. When we found out we were too early to even check-in, I bought us a couple of bus tickets to take us a few miles away to a Denny’s where we could have a proper breakfast without paying $100. It started raining as we alighted from the bus and walked across an intersection to the restaurant and we were disappointed to see a small crowd of people waiting for a table.
There were plenty of tables open but obviously no staff to serve the mass of people who were doing the same thing as us. We waited nearly two hours but when we finally had pancakes, eggs and bacon in front of us, we were happy. Once close to being in food comas, we left our table to head slowly back to the airport.
Once there, we ditched our bag along with the Alpha Tauri team who were mobbing the bag check area. We then found some snobby personnel at the United lounge telling us that our one-time passes would not be accepted today. Well! Fine, we joined the plebs at our gate and killed time reading and people watching. It’s amazing that anyone can get out of an airport the day after a Grand Prix, there must have been 50,000 people in the building. At the ate alongside us, people were searching for help to find a flight to replace the one that had been cancelled and we were happy not to be in their shoes.
We appreciated our direct flight, snoozing for a lot of the five hours back to California. We were also happy to be flying into SFO, therefore having a short Uber ride back home. For people who don’t use Uber very often, we’d had enough and just wanted to buzz around in our SVT again. We picked up Cleo the next morning and sat down to watch a replays of the race weekend, looking especially closely at the Turn 1 crowd, but just grateful to know that we’d been there and we’d done it our way.
